Once again, if you’d like the HBO Synopsis (and the link to this picture) click here. My synopsis follows….the better synopsis. Kind of like pork is the other white meat. Except I don’t eat pork. And they say other, and not better. Okay, so my reference sucks, but my summary is better, I promise!

So, this is the oh-so-rare occasion where I’m not actually watching the episode to give a synopsis, so I’ll do this the best I can with what I remember. It’s been a while since we’ve seen Sally, and all of a sudden, she’s back and Jemaine sees her in a laundromat. They start talking a bit, and Sally mentions how she wants to settle down someday. This is when “Business Time” starts, one of the greatest songs in the Conchords repertoire. Jemaine is imagining his life with Sally, and it’s definitely a typical, realistic view of what happens after two people are married after a while….or at least, what everyone dreads is going to happen, however, Jemaine seems to idealize this idea.

The two start hanging out again, but Sally insists that Jemaine needs to get his own place and not live with Bret anymore, so he does just that. He moves into a very swanky apartment complex….although his apartment isn’t quite matching the building. He actually moves into a janitor’s closet. Jemaine later talks about hosting a party on the weekend.

Bret gets, well, let’s say, miffed at all these new arrangements. First of all, Jemaine has left him to move somewhere else, and the other reason is Sally, whom Bret dated for like 6 months. He starts to get jealous and shows his feelings for Sally, although he’s still dating Coco. Sally’s birthday is coming up, so Bret and Jemaine both compete to make something that Sally will love. Bret comes up with a song, Jemaine comes up with an amazing paper cut-out card. The two upgrade from there, until it gets to a pebble with Sally’s name on it and a glass butterfly.

Sadly, the competition backfires, although it’s well-displayed in the gifts and in the song “Sally, I Love You,” where Jemaine echoes all of Bret’s sentiments. It turns out that Sally has a boyfriend, a fiance, actually, and worst of all, he’s Australian. Coco also breaks up with Bret because it’s obvious to her that he still has feelings for Sally. The break-up is actually conveyed through Jemaine, and is undeniably the best conversation in the episode.

So, that’s the best I can come up with from memory. If there’s a part of the episode that I forgot and you love it, correct me and add it in a comment. I know that my mind isn’t perfect, but I think I hit just about everything. Oh, also, I love Rachel Blanchard. You should too.

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Once again, for the HBO synopsis, click here. For my much more awesome synopsis, read below.

So, the episode starts with a proposition for a great tour of band rotundas by Murray. However, Bret isn’t having it because he’s going on a date with Coco, his new girlfriend. Jemaine tries to get out of it saying he met a girl at the video library, but Murray got him, clever Murray, since there’s no such thing as a video library.

We then get to see Bret and his ladyfriend at her apartment, wit the deliciously awkward ending to their date, where we find out that Jemaine has joined on in the date. It is a continuing theme during the episode hereafter. Sad, sad, Jemaine.

The next day we see the guys at the apartment where Bret sings his song for Coco to Jemaine. It’s two hours long, so Jemaine suggests that Bret shorten it, and also make it more realistic, to things that he would actually do instead of saying that he’d do things like climb the highest mountain and race the fastest animal. This is what gives birth to “If You’re Into It,” which is disputably my favorite song thus far.

You also get to see a fan club meeting in the episode, which is Mel….and that’s it. Murray provides pictures for the newsletter, including one that just “slipped in” with the others of him shirtless. Needless to say, Mel wasn’t interested. However, she was very interested in the fact that Bret had a girlfriend, so much that she broke her pencil in hidden anger. Never ceasing to put the “fan” in “fanatically crazy woman,” this may be Mel’s best display of fan obsession so far.

So, after the song “If You’re Into It,” there is a small montage of the Jemaine tag-along-ness, and Bret finally telling him he’s got to cut it out. This makes Jeamine mad and he calls her “Yoko” and slips “Ono” into his conversation during a band meeting. It ends with Bret throwing a sandwich at Jemaine’s face, which, quite honestly, made me explode with laughter.

Don’t despair about this discord, however, folks, because luckily there is a song to bring everyone together at the end….like tape does. Ironically and appropriately, the song sings about tape, and is even called “Sello Tape,” so you really can’t be confused by the meaning of the song or the imagery that is employed.

This is a great episode, fun had by all, please watch it and love it and tell me how you feel about it as well.

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Bret:

Oh my God. She’s so hot.
She’s so flippin’ hot. She’s like a curry.
I want to tell her how hot she is, but she’ll think I’m being sexist.
She’s so hot she’s making me sexist.
Bitch.
I think I need a 1983 Cascio DG-20 electric guitar set to electric mandolin, some drums.
Yeah. Hear me now!

I see you with a sign I want to boom like it’s never been done
Bust moves like the click boom of a gun
My beats stay locked and my eyes are zooming
My feet starts tweaking and my body’s booming
The first day of boom and the flowers are blooming
Booty boom bass and the party is booming
Boom ba-boom like a rocket taking off to the moon
Boom boom like a bride and boom-ah
See you shaking that boom boom
See you looking at my boom boom
See you want some boom boom
It’s clear it’s boom time, boom boom
Let me buy you a boom boom
You order a fancy boom
You like boom, and I like boom
Enough small boom let’s boom the boom-ah

Jemaine:

Fast-forward selector

Bret:

Now we’re rolling on a boom boom
Riding to my private room
And we boom what’s boom and we both assume
We’re gonna boom boom boom ’til the break of boom

Bret:

Who’s the boom king?

Jemaine:

Who?

Bret:

I’m the boom king!

Jemaine:

What?

Bret:

Who’s the boom king?

Jemaine:

Tell me now.

Bret:

I’m the boom king

Jemaine:

He’s the boom king.

Bret:

My phone is beeping it’s B-boom boom
He’s back from ten years doom and gloom
He said he had his boom chopped off in the boom
But the crazy boom still loves to boom

Unzip the boom and the lens goes zoom
Your b-boom drops, ba-doom ba-boom boom
We both get freaky and my boom gets leaky
Then we boom boom boom boom boom boom boom

Who’s the boom king?

Jemaine:

Who?

Bret:

I’m the boom king!

Jemaine:

What?

Bret:

Who’s the boom king?

Jemaine:

Hah!

Bret:

I’m the boom king

Jemaine:

Bret’s the boom king

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Post from: Conchord Crazy

Just like last week, here’s the link to the HBO synopsis of the episode. You can find my own, much more lengthy synopsis, below!

So, all we need to get to is the second episode before we realize that Bret and Jemaine are having money troubles. Bret comes home with some groceries, and Jemaine starts to eat a sandwich before being told that Bret just found them on the street. This causes a lot of torment, and starts the song “Inner City Pressure,” which has great synth effects, if you were curious.

The duo go to Murray’s office to have a band meeting, where they ask for any money they’ve saved away, which is like four dollars, since they lost six to buying the cash box to put it in. They’ve also tried selling merch, but only two t-shirts and zero mousepads have moved. 

They decide to get a job to support themselves, but only Bret is hired as a sign-holder, since Jemaine cracked that a lamppost could do the job that was required. However, Bret’s job poses a problem once Murray actually gets the band a gig for once, causing tension in the group.

Then the magic moment comes where Bret meets Coco, his new interest, and the song “She’s So Hot/BOOM!” starts up. One of my favorite lines of the song is, “She’s so hot she’s making me sexist.” The song that proceeds consists of many words replaced by “boom.” Good times, for sure.

The episode then goes to the convention where New Zealand’s booth is right next to Australia’s, and Australia is really being a jackass, to say the least. Sadly, the only thing New Zealand’s booth has to offer is rocks, The Lord of the Rings filming fame, a fence made out of toothbrushes, and Flight of the Conchords, which is missing Bret, who is replaced by a tape. The tape was actually well-received, and Bret is kicked out in order to make room for the tape. After this is a delightfully creepy car ride with Mel, which is always a pleasure to watch, that is, if you get pleasure out of being uncomfortable and afraid.

There’s a mini-montage of the two separated, and then Jemaine and Murray sit and talk about the pros and cons of the tape vs. Bret. One of the pros of a tape: “More compact.” Sadly, the tape is ruined and then Jemaine is out of the band as well. Jemaine then needs Bret in order to put the band back together, so he tries to convince him to join the band for a while, also while coming up with ideas to replace Bret unless he can’t convince him.

The next day, Bret is talking with Coco and finds out that she likes bands more than sings, so he’s back in the band. He figures out a way to manage both work and the band, and the episode ends harmoniously, as it should. His boss even makes a Flight of the Conchords sign using a hot dog sign. Thank goodness Bret didn’t get replaced with Brent, right? The rest of the season would be, like, really weird then.

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